Jeff Goldblum, I love you. I loved your dramatic fake death in New Zealand. I love that you dated Nicole Richie back when she was still totally into drugging and dieting. I love the Law & Order episode where you find a murderer based on DNA evidence collected from a bedbug. But most of all I love the way you get nekkid on the beach. Sweetheart, you make no mistakes. Please let me be your 24 year old girlfriend.
for some reason, i bet jeff goldblum does roofies for fun...and that makes him cooler for some reason.
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