Wednesday, December 2, 2009

It's over, Mark. Deal with it.


Facebook has morphed into a crazy ex. I decided to give up the website about 4 months ago, since all I ever used it for was stalking myself (full disclosure: this is my only hobby), and for a nausea induction agent when I would stumble (I swear it was accidentally) on communications between acquaintances and one of my former significant bedfellow's who had been defriended. I didn't want to quit ye ol 'book entirely, because though I don't stalk people other than myself, I still wanted other to be able to stalk me, and look at all those amazing pictures of me having so much fun, so, I had a trusted friend change my password, and used self control to restrain myself from clicking the 'forgot my password' link. It was fabulous for awhile, it was basically like having a personal assistant or secretary manage my online persona (i.e rejecting weirdo friend requests and making sure i don't look like a cow in tagged photos). But now, Facebook, the unrelenting ex, is conning friends into contacting me on its behalf. 5 people have written on my wall telling me that facebook wants to reconnect, and that we need to talk, and that it will be better this time around. Is there anyway to get a digital restraining order, but you know, still let people stalk me?

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